I went to a psychiatrist
He told me I was nutty
He said thanks to genetics
I had brain cells made of putty
So he gave me lots of pills
And said that they would help me function:
Twenty pills to take with breakfast
Fifty more to take with luncheon
I take pills to help me concentrate
And keep my mind from swimmin’
I take pills that calm my jitters
When I speak to pretty women
I take pills that wake me up
And make my eyes a bit less bleary
I take pills that make me happy
Even when the world is dreary
I need my pills to fall asleep
And though it may seem silly
I need pills to help me harden up
Or soften down my willy
I take pills that help me do my work
And pills that calm my mood
And pills that help me curb
My appetite for certain food
Certain pills help me remember
To take all the pills I take
And if I lost those pills
I'd live a pill-less life by mistake.
