Wonkbeast, antlers big as goats
Skin like barnacles on boats
Teeth are yellow, eyes are red
Maggots dwell upon his head
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
Blinkworm, handsome, thin and tall
Skin as perfect as a doll
Smells like fresh-baked cakes and sweets
Silver slippers on his feet
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
Wonkbeast, shy and good at math
Never learned to take a bath
Stutters when he tries to speak
Hairy wart upon his cheek
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
Blinkworm, extroverted, loud
Loves to talk in front of crowds
Drives a brand new Rolls Royce
Has a lovely singing voice
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
Wonkbeast, gentle, clumsy, fat
Cooks his oatmeal in a vat
Rescues birds that fall from nests
Knits scum-colored sweater vests
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
Blinkworm’s wallet’s full of dough
(Where’d he get that money, though?)
Throws a giant public fair
With circus girls and dancing bears
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
Wonkbeast lives to ninety-three
Sits beneath a willow tree
There he sucks his final breath
And, alone, succumbs to death
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast
Blinkworm leaves a paper trail
Of laundered money; goes to jail
But someone with a lot of clout
Proudly bails the blinkworm out
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
Wonkbeast’s corpse has turned to dust
Blinkworm dies, as blinkworms must
Hordes of mourners come in waves
To sob upon the blinkworm’s grave
Everyone cries when the blinkworm dies
But none shed a tear for the wonkbeast.
