A Sepiadventure

A man in a land full of color

Was as bored as a bear in a zoo

He decided a sepiadventure

Would be just what he needed to do

So he waved bye to green, pink and purple

And he bid turquoise sepiadieu

And he put on his sepiadidas

To begin his life sepianew

Then he walked to the edge of all color

Which he felt to be sepiabsurd

Then he spread out his sepiarms widely

And lept into the sky like a bird

He felt simply sepiamazing

But something was sepiamiss

At the end of his flight there was nothing in sight

He fell into a sepiabyss.

Tiptoe, tiptoe Tiptoe Man

Tiptoe, tiptoe Tiptoe Man

You haven’t got a face

The shifty clouds; they’ll lock you in

Beware their fickle grace.

Beware the trees of firework limbs

They act as nature’s spies

Their leaves are like a polygraph

Detecting dirty lies.

They’ll tell your secrets to the grass

Which whispers to the air

And soon the breeze will pick them up

And blow them everywhere

Cut down the trees? You can’t, my dear

They’ll always grow and grow

Oh tiptoe, tiptoe Tiptoe Man

You’ve got no place to go.

The McBloop Acrobatic Egg Troop

The most wonderful man that you ever will meet

Is Bartholomew Boppin McBloop

He’s famous, of course, for his world-renowned

McBloop Acrobatic Egg Troop

“Behold the most talented eggs of our time!”

Bellows Bart to the thunderous throng

And in come the performers…they’re walking on top

Of a rolling pin rolling along!

They do flips, they do kicks, they do spins, they do twirls

‘Til their feetsies become a bit tender

Then each of the eggs takes a daredevil ride

On the dangerous, wild, bucking blender!

Then they sword fight with forks on the top of a cake

And I promise that I’m not a liar

When I say that they pole vault with skewers as poles

Through a big flaming circle of fire!

Then the eggs do a tightrope walk over the stove

With all of them risking their lives

Then some of them walk using chopsticks as stilts

And the rest of them juggle sharp knives!

Then they feature Yolkdini, the bravest of all

An egg who’s no stranger to risks

He’s given minute or less to escape

From a bowl full of egg-beating whisks!

Then all of them tiptoe across oven racks

And they pray that their toesies don’t fry

Then finally they pile in a big oven mitt

And you clap as it waves you goodbye!

So if you see an ad for a circus of eggs

That says it’s the best in the nation

Make sure it’s McBloop’s Acrobatic Egg Troop

All the rest are just cheap imitations.