They say meditation is really quite pleasant
It allows you to focus--look! half-off sale!--on the present
They say that this focus is really relaxin'
That you learn to avoid--look! a billboard!--distraction
To be generous and patient, to admit when you’re wrong
To maintain—argh, this drive-through is taking too long!
To observe the world gently, with calm, alert eyes
To—No you can’t taste them! They're my cheesy fries!
You'll learn to plunge past the rational mind
To respect the earth's creatures--hey, pass the pork rinds!
To see infinite truth in each grain of sand
To live simply--check out my new tanning booth tan!
They say that deep breathing brings purification
That--rats, out of cigarettes! where's a gas station?
They say your mind's a locked door, and meditation's the key
But who needs it? Sounds boring. Let's go watch T.V.
